TikTok came for me while I was in bed this morning. The post pulled knives!!! “If you can’t do your hobbies when anyone else is home it isn’t so much that you always want to hang out with people, it’s a trauma response based on the fact that you used to regulate everyone’s emotions.”
Cause this has been the root of my problem this whole two years. And I’m slowly getting my groove back. Not because people are out of my space yet. Not because I’ve fixed all that growing-up trauma either. But because, and let me know if you feel the same way, I HAVE TO. I’m fighting into a new way of working. Writing and creating is a huge part of what makes me, me. I’m sick and tired of being a frustrated turtle. It’s time to adapt.
I’m rearranging how I prioritize other people’s needs over work I do. I’m exhausted with feeling like I can’t pause and dream and create. I’m still figuring out this new way of working. I’m a huge fan of charts and to do lists (HELLO dopamine). Also there will be a fair amount of delineating what time belongs to me.
It used to be that I had a block of “work time” from 10 am to 3:30 and that was perfect. I’m like a Montessori kid with my uninterrupted time. I’ve never been the sort of person who can write on their lunch break and for an hour after work. All the respect to humans who work that way–I see what you’re doing over there and I’ve got serious FOMO.
My first step into changing how I work? just finished a HUGE project revision that’s been languishing while the last nine months of my life burnt down (family stuff, you know). I’m super proud of how the little food truck book that could has turned out. Keep all your fingers crossed for me–I’ve queried my dream agents with this one 🧡
Take care and save some time for yourself.